If you have read my earlier posts, you would know that I am currently taking directing class in Harvard Summer School.
To go more specific into it, this directing class teaches you how to direct theatre productions-- how to deal with writing a script, communicating with actors, designing stage lights and props, and much more.
Its a lot like being a CEO or manager, actually. You need to direct. This means that there are many people counting on you to be decisive and tell them what you do.
In class, we have a limited time period of 3 hours. Seems like a lot when you first look at it, yet in one class we must get through about 20 scenes from 20 different students-- and that gives each student a very short amount of time to "direct" each scene.
Throughout the course of the long and grueling class, I observed the actions of myself and the other students. I realized there was one thing of main importance that determined whether a scene could be successfully directed in such a short amount of time-- and that was Assertiveness.
In order to coordinate what you needed to be done in under 5 minuets with the actors and stage management while still being able to convey the general gist and story of the film, you really needed to be a clear and forceful communicator. Yet, you can't be rude either-- so you have to be very kind and polite when implying your forcefulness. It's a very tricky art.
If you are completely rude and bossy, you are being aggressive--which you don't want. If you are being weak and soft-spoken without getting stuff done, you are being passive-- which is definitely not what you want either. So what you want to be is assertive-- the middle ground between these two in which you find perfect balance.
And from my personal experience, being Assertive is not only important to Directors. Its the right way to act for, well, any kind of interaction at all.
Lets say you are a girl, and a guy is asking you out-- but you aren't interested.
Being overly passive is letting the guy completely take
advantage of you, and ending up agreeing to do something you don't want. Being overly aggressive means hurting the guy's feelings by being blunt and rude, and leaving a very bad impression of yourself.
Being assertive means getting your point across("I'm not interested in getting into that sort of relationship") while still being polite (starting with "I'm sorry", or "I'm flattered".)
And don't think it only applies to challenging situations.
You need to do utilize assertiveness even when you are refusing to get a membership card at the store!
Cashier: Ma'am/Sir, would you like to get a membership card for CVS? It only costs 5 dollars and guarantees you a lower sales price for many objects in the store.
Aggressive response: Look, I, no. Ok? I'm not interested in.. whatever card. Just scan my items. (Cashier looks disgruntled and other customers give you weird looks)
Passive response: Em, I... I don't know, I'm really sorry.. but.. I'm not sure if, like, yah. I just don't think.. I need.. it? (cashier proceeds to do more convincing until you give in)
Assertive response: No, I'm good, thanks for the offer.
The other very interesting thing that I noticed about this is, assertiveness (or lack of) actually reflects your state of confidence and security.
Usually, being overly passive or being overly aggressive stems from insecurity. Because you feel like you are not secure and confident enough, you end up talking with no strength at all(passive), or you over-compensate by taking on an overly strong stance-- because you don't sense the negative reactions it causes since you are too busy trying to seem confident.
However, if you are in a stable emotional place-- you can clearly convey your own intentions while maintaining good relations with others.
Its funny; I observed how when I'm more confident, I'm usually more assertive-- while when I'm not, I'm much more passive.
Its an Art, it truly is. And not mastering it really has dire consequences.
What do you guys think? Any personal experiences?
To go more specific into it, this directing class teaches you how to direct theatre productions-- how to deal with writing a script, communicating with actors, designing stage lights and props, and much more.
Its a lot like being a CEO or manager, actually. You need to direct. This means that there are many people counting on you to be decisive and tell them what you do.
In class, we have a limited time period of 3 hours. Seems like a lot when you first look at it, yet in one class we must get through about 20 scenes from 20 different students-- and that gives each student a very short amount of time to "direct" each scene.
Throughout the course of the long and grueling class, I observed the actions of myself and the other students. I realized there was one thing of main importance that determined whether a scene could be successfully directed in such a short amount of time-- and that was Assertiveness.
In order to coordinate what you needed to be done in under 5 minuets with the actors and stage management while still being able to convey the general gist and story of the film, you really needed to be a clear and forceful communicator. Yet, you can't be rude either-- so you have to be very kind and polite when implying your forcefulness. It's a very tricky art.
If you are completely rude and bossy, you are being aggressive--which you don't want. If you are being weak and soft-spoken without getting stuff done, you are being passive-- which is definitely not what you want either. So what you want to be is assertive-- the middle ground between these two in which you find perfect balance.
And from my personal experience, being Assertive is not only important to Directors. Its the right way to act for, well, any kind of interaction at all.
Lets say you are a girl, and a guy is asking you out-- but you aren't interested.
Being overly passive is letting the guy completely take
advantage of you, and ending up agreeing to do something you don't want. Being overly aggressive means hurting the guy's feelings by being blunt and rude, and leaving a very bad impression of yourself.
Being assertive means getting your point across("I'm not interested in getting into that sort of relationship") while still being polite (starting with "I'm sorry", or "I'm flattered".)
And don't think it only applies to challenging situations.
You need to do utilize assertiveness even when you are refusing to get a membership card at the store!
Cashier: Ma'am/Sir, would you like to get a membership card for CVS? It only costs 5 dollars and guarantees you a lower sales price for many objects in the store.
Aggressive response: Look, I, no. Ok? I'm not interested in.. whatever card. Just scan my items. (Cashier looks disgruntled and other customers give you weird looks)
Passive response: Em, I... I don't know, I'm really sorry.. but.. I'm not sure if, like, yah. I just don't think.. I need.. it? (cashier proceeds to do more convincing until you give in)
Assertive response: No, I'm good, thanks for the offer.
The other very interesting thing that I noticed about this is, assertiveness (or lack of) actually reflects your state of confidence and security.
Usually, being overly passive or being overly aggressive stems from insecurity. Because you feel like you are not secure and confident enough, you end up talking with no strength at all(passive), or you over-compensate by taking on an overly strong stance-- because you don't sense the negative reactions it causes since you are too busy trying to seem confident.
However, if you are in a stable emotional place-- you can clearly convey your own intentions while maintaining good relations with others.
Its funny; I observed how when I'm more confident, I'm usually more assertive-- while when I'm not, I'm much more passive.
Its an Art, it truly is. And not mastering it really has dire consequences.
What do you guys think? Any personal experiences?